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Direct Answers - Column as the week of June 24, 2002
I assume there are worse problems than having two men who want to share their life with me. However, it is a genuine problem. I do absence counsel on sorting this always out.
My sometime husband and I wanted a baby and presently had an. The problems in our marriage stemmed from 2 teen daughters from his 1st wedding. Their mother jumped boat behind 10 years to "find herself," leaving him to raise the girls.
Suffice it to say the girls were exceedingly hard aboard me, and his household didn't adopt that 3 years after his divorce, he moved on. We sought counseling, merely it didn't determine everything. I grew tiresome attempting to raise two girls that disliked me and dealing with his hostile family.
That was four years antecedent. For the next two years he was so painful I left he wouldn't speak to me, and all communication was through third parties. Life has been difficult for me raising a son on my own. I had to sell the home I bought for the two of us and am still struggling financially.
After two years, I met a man with a son the same old as mine,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and the boys rapidly became like brothers. His father and I also amplified a close, intimate relationship, and he is financially successful. We've been together nearly two years and bought a home with the aim of getting marital soon.
My current relationship never had the spark of sexual and feelingful intensity my former husband and I shared. Still, we were content until I talked to my former husband for the first time in nearly two years.
Therein lies the catch. My former husband says now thathis youngest daughter has shook out, he is free to live life as he wants. He gives me flowers,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], writes me adore notes, and says he wants to devote the rest of his years to bringing up our son together.
I not fell out of love with him, I equitable left the marriage lonesome and quite hurt. He says he, too, spent a long time trying to heal and is now ready to try to put it together again. We are not having sex. I know better. But my former husband gives me the consideration I crave in my present relationship and don't get.
It seems odd to me that whether a male really wanted to share his life with his son and his son's mama, he could stomach them alive with distinct male. I likewise find it uncommon that my boyfriend,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], for an mature man,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is willing to stomach the advances of anyone man toward the matron he wishes to marry.
My third option would be to acquaint each man, politely, that nor made a faultless spouse for me. Unfortunately, I'm in no rank to be without a helpmate. I'm not holding out for a perfect relationship anymore. I realize that just doesn't exist, at fewest not in my globe.
Jenna
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Jenna