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When you Decide Not to Have a Child
Fulfillment Without Children
Accepting you cannot have your own biological child takes time and there is a healing process. There are, however [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], wonderful worthwhile options that you can consider to fulfill your dream of having a child through surrogacy, donor eggs and/or sperm and adoption. Take time to determine what is the most realistic option for you.
If without a doubt you want a child, then pursue this dream regardless of the challenge. Those who are undecided should not make a hasty decision, as there are few decisions in life that cannot be undone [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and you do not want to have a child merely because you “think” you want one. Some serious soul searching needs to take place to determine your true desires and wants, and uncover the reasons behind your choices. Whatever choice you make needs to be what’s right for you in order to bring peace without regret.
Infertility can feel like a loss, and in a sense a death of a dream, that takes time to grieve. Whether infertility comes from a medical condition, hysterectomy [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], early menopause, bad timing or failed IVF attempts, it is a loss nonetheless that might require counselling.
If you thought you were always meant to have children in your life, you still can. Become a teacher or day care worker; become a big brother or sister to underprivileged children. Shower your love on your nieces and nephews. There are many ways that you can be involved with children.
Be at peace with your decision not to have a child. The most important part of this process is the acceptance of your decision and having no regrets. After the initial grieving process and the necessary healing has taken place, embrace and be empowered by your decision and move forward and enjoy the rest of your life.
Alternative Options for a Child
There are challenges and risks associated with all options. A complex range of emotions and tough decisions may be involved that leave you feeling disillusioned at times and questioning your true desires. You might find yourself re-evaluating your life and make the difficult decision not to continue with your pursuit for a child.
Allow yourself to see the rewards to not having children without feeling guilty. Change your thought process from what you don’t have in life to what you can have. Instead of picturing yourself raising a family, picture yourself and your life without children and what that can mean for you. Visualize a change in career, travelling, being carefree and spontaneous, a more passionate relationship, new hobbies. Think of all the things that you might not be able to do if you had a child. It might turn out that a childfree lifestyle might be right for you after all.
Read on
Adoptive Couples and Grandparents, Their Motives and Reasons
Choosing Life Insurance for Children & Babies
Fence Sitting Over Parenthood
Having Children in Your Life